Highly Sensitive Families

I’ve written before about my child as a “Spirited Child,” or as “Highly Sensitive.” Highly Sensitive is a relatively new term to describe a person who is just that–sensitive. To the world, to stimuli around us, to relationships and energies… For them, the world is just… more.

One of the blessings of my baby’s sensitivity was that it started to open us up to understanding our family as sensitive as a whole. I started learning about both my and my partner’s limitations based on our sensitivities, which were often ignored during our childhood. There’s good and bad to realizing this about ourselves. On the one hand, it makes us extra sympathetic to our little guy’s struggle… and on the other, it makes us triggered a lot more often. 

Here are some traits of highly sensitive parents:

-They are easily overwhelmed by their baby crying

-They are impacted quickly by their partner’s moods

-They may startle easily or be more sensitive to discomfort

-They are deeply moved by movies, music, and art

-They are very intuitive surrounding the needs of others

-When they were children, they were often called “shy”

-They may often need a quiet place to retreat to, away from stimulation

These are traits that make for a VERY attuned parent. In so many ways, this is wonderful! But the paradox is that these same gifts lead to being overstimulated and overwhelmed, sometimes at the drop of a hat. 

For the highly sensitive parent, it’s incredibly important to embark on the journey of doing their own inner child work. Understanding who we were as sensitive, creative, easily-overwhelmed, intuitive children is imperative to understanding HS children. This work is hard for any parent. 

If you think your family may be a highly sensitive one, I strongly recommend all of the “Highly Sensitive” books, starting with “The Highly Sensitive Parent.” Understanding this was key in transforming our journey with our own child, starting–of course–with compassion for ourselves.